Be Careful when selecting the date of your up-coming Hen Party.

The last thing you need is a clash with the general election.

Its all very well to line up the gang of Hens, pink boas draped over the shoulders, red devils horns flashing on the heads of the female crew, tee-shirts emblazoned with the name of the bride to be, tickets bought, hotels booked, afternoon activities pencilled in and suddenly you find yourself and all hanging from you on the deserted streets of Scunthorpe as the rest of the population has fecked off to vote for some political rear-end kisser that recently knocked on the front door and promised a new set of false teeth for the granny incidentally who passed away five years ago.

While you and the girls are doing all in your power to set the place alight and have a brilliant time, the rest of the population is glued to the BBC to see which one of the highly “qualified” candidates has crossed the line that will guarantee them a healthy salary and loads of perks while the rest of the country’s hens sweat for a living.

It’s Time to start a new political party.